21 Sneakerhead Confessions That Will Make You Question Your Life Choices

Look, we’ve all done things for the love of sneakers that we’re not proud of. Some of us have lied to partners, skipped rent, cried in Foot Locker, or straight-up committed crimes against common sense. Today, the people (anonymously, of course) are confessing their darkest, some dumb and mostly hilarious sneaker sins.

Grab a drink, lock the door so your significant other doesn’t see this, and enjoy the chaos.

1. “I sold my 2012 Galaxy Foams to pay rent… then spent the rent money on Travis Scott Reverse Mochas the same week. Landlord still thinks I’m ‘waiting on a bonus’.”

2. “Ghosted a girl mid-date because she said ‘I just buy whatever’s cute at Foot Locker.’ Couldn’t risk the bloodline.”

3. “Been wearing fake Yeezys to the office for two years. Boss just said ‘Man, those look legit.’ I went to the bathroom and had a full existential crisis.”

4. “Told my girlfriend the Union 1s were $180. She found the StockX receipt for $950. We broke up. 10/10 would do again.”

5. “I own 47 pairs of Panda Dunks. I hate them now. Send help (or a bigger closet).”

6. “Let my dog chew my 2015 Chicago 1s because the midsoles yellowed. I still wake up in cold sweats.”

7. “Flew to Tokyo for Sacai VaporWaffles, got explosive food poisoning, shit myself in Harajuku, still wore the shoes on the 14-hour flight home. Smelled like victory (and regret).”

8. “Mom threw out my beat-to-hell 2001 Wheat Dunk Highs thinking they were trash. Didn’t speak to her for a month. We’re Italian, that’s basically disowning her.”

9. “Paid a Craigslist dude $800 for ‘DS 2017 Royal 1s.’ Got Black Toes with a Sharpie swoosh. Wore them anyway because I’m not a quitter.”

10. “I have a savings account labeled ‘Emergency Fund’ that’s actually just for sneakers. Current balance: $9,400. The emergency is if Travis drops tomorrow.”

11. “Told my wife I was going to therapy. I was actually camping outside Social Status for the Lost & Found 1s.”

12. “I own three pairs of the same Off-White Prestos: one to rock, one to stock, one ‘just in case the first two somehow crease in the box.’”

13. “Full-on cried in the Nike store when they said my size in the Travis British Khaki 6s sold out. Cried like a toddler as an 25 year old girl. Employee gave me a hug.”

14. “Used my entire student-loan refund on 2016 Belugas. Still haven’t graduated. Worth it.”

15. “I have a burner Instagram with 11 followers just for entering raffles so my main doesn’t look thirsty.”

16. “Told my boyfriend I’m a women’s size 7. I’m a 9.5. Been squeezing into everything for three years so my collection looks smaller than it is. My toes are numb but the lie lives on.”

17. “Wore my grail Bred Toe 1s to the club. Someone spilled vodka Red Bull on them. I swung on him. Got bounced. Shoes still sticky in 2025.”

18. “Named my son Jordan. Wife thinks it’s after her grandfather. It’s not. Grandpa’s name was Harold.”

19. “I told my mom I needed new ‘school shoes.’ Bought Off-White Jordan 4 Sail instead. Graduated college in them. No regrets.”

20. “I once told a sneaker plug my grandma died so he’d hold a size 11 for me. She’s alive and well and still sending me Bible verses.”

21. “I have a pair of 2011 Concords I’ve never worn because ‘the timing has to feel right.’ They’ve been in the box for 14 years. I’m waiting for the perfect Tuesday.”

There you have it - 21 people who have now shared their sins for the love of sneakers.

Now it’s your turn. What’s YOUR most unhinged sneakerhead confession? Drop it in the comments (anonymously if you’re scared) or Message us. The best ones go in part two—and yes, we’ll keep your name out of it (unless you beg for clout).

Keep copping, keep creasing, and keep lying to your partners.